We all worry about our kids, especially socially. We want them to be treated well. We want them to be loved by their peers. We want them to have incredible friendships that last them for years to come.
Some kids are naturally social, and do an amazing job socializing with others. But many other children are shy and anxious. Some may even find socializing to be incredibly difficult. Maybe they’re able to find some friendships that are meaningful to them, but in general, when faced with new kids, they tend to shut down.
As parents, it’s normal to see this and wonder if this is a big problem or something they’ll eventually grow out of. The idea of taking a child to therapy just because they’re a little shy may seem silly. At the same time, we don’t want to wake up one morning and our child has experienced years of social isolation.
- When should a child see a therapist?
- What are the signs?
- Will by child grow out of it on their own?
As therapists, however, our recommendations are more nuanced. It’s true that some children grow out of their anxiety, and that not all “social anxiety” is debilitating. But there’s a hidden question here that needs to be answered: does it matter?
Skill Building and Long Term Support
Our children are learning so much each and every day. Not only math, reading, and science, but also in how they cope with stress, how they overcome adversity, how they interact and maintain social relationships, and much more.
Therapy can teach these skills. It does not require a diagnosis. It is not solely for those that are struggling with their mental health. Even with adults, therapy can be an invaluable tool to help navigate life’s complexities, even without a diagnosable mental health issue.
So, if you’re wondering if your child should see a therapist, the answer can be “yes” at any time, simply because it provides an opportunity to learn some amazing skills.
With that in mind, if you are worried about your child, you should consider an intake appointment. In children, social anxiety and introversion can sometimes seem similar, and a bit of shyness may appear as anxiousness while severe social anxiety can appear to be shyness. We can evaluate this at our appointment.
If you’re looking for signs on your own, look to see how they feel before and after social experiences, and see if they’re able to warm up if given adequate time. Children that are happy to go to social functions and enjoyed them despite their shyness may just not be as talkative or outgoing as other children. Kids that are able to warm up over time may experience some anxiety, but are in the process of developing tools to comfort themselves and overcome it.
Remember, you can always consider an intake appointment to see how a child is doing as well. So if you’re not sure, give us a call. Let’s connect you with a therapist, have them meet your child, and then see if we feel that there is a good fit. We’re happy to listen to your concerns and come up with conclusions to help make sure your child gets the developmental support they need. Reach out today to get started.
